In It For The kids?

When you look at a married couple do you ever wonder if they are truly still in love? Has their love for one another changed over the years of marriage? Have they fallen in and out of love for one another, or are they still happily in love and fall more and more for their spouse each day?

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As for me being married for almost 12 years I can testify that it isn't always rainbows and butterflies but I can promise that because the love my husband and I have for each other we make it through each day and promise to be better tomorrow at showing our love and support for one another. We do this for our children. It is important to us that our children see us as not only a loving mother and father to each of them but a loving husband and wife to one another.

Many may not be aware that children are effected by their parents marriage. They can feel the tension when it arises they can hear the words exchanged and they can see when one is avoiding the other. On the flip side they also can see the kisses exchanged, the hand being lifted to help in house hold duties, and the intimacy that should be present in marriage daily.

 Raising children in a two parent home shows that the children have a higher standard of living, receive more effective parenting, and experience more parenting done by both parents. These children being raised by both their parents in the same home also are emotionally closer to both their mom and dad and are subjected to less stressful events in their lives. On the opposite side of this children in a divorced family tend to have weaker emotional bonds with mothers and fathers than do their peers in a two-parent family. When both parents are present in a child's life they have that love and support they need to learn and grow.

When self evaluating your own personal marriage do you stay in it for the kids? Are you avoiding divorce because you don't want your children to suffer the stresses that come from being a child of divorced parents. Do we want that for our kids? Do we want our kids to see us struggling and not happy or do we want our children to see us as someone who faces our fears and better our lives by getting out of a marriage that isn't healthy. It's a tough question. You won't know till you are in the situation, you can only know facts. If you stay married for the kids be the example of commitment and love you want them to go forth in life and have in their marriage. Change the odds. Allow them to see what marriage should be. Children are our future and they need stable and secure places to live and grow emotionally and socially.


(photos credit to @Columbia pictures and www.aproverbswife.com)